September 2011
20 posts
day 10
i think that i can manage. although i may only think that because i feel totally out of it. Hear You Me can do that to you. Jimmy Eat World is…..amazing. playing McCall this weekend. scared. but things will be different this year. even if i cut thats ok. im trying to stop, but its not the end of the world if i do. the difference is, now i have hope. now i have a reason to press on. and thats...
2 tags
day 9
well its been over a week. im dong better than i was before. even though we lost pretty bad friday night. football kind of sucks right now. i hate most of my teammates. i dont want to be around them anymore than i have to. this post is gonna be a little ramble. to the extreme. im just gonna word vomit because ive kinda been bottling things lately. i really like ray bradbury. im sorry for my bad...
2 tags
1 tag
dont ever hesitate. reblog this.
Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
day 2
it sucks to only write a one digit number in the title line.
today was a good day though. the fact that i cut is…showing me some things. im sorry for some things i said that may have been rash. i was lashing out against a world thats not treating me fairly when i feel it should. but thats not written anywhere.
i got put in therapy the first time because i was suicidal. at least thats how i...
day 0
yep. it happened. im sorry i let all you down but i think i should probably just kinda vent everything that ive been thinking lately. i feel like starting this was a bad idea. that it added to the pressure on me. i felt like all of you were so worried that i would cut and that if i did i would let all of you down. im sorry everybody. im so sorry :/ i feel like i cant do all this. just school would...
You know what? I’m going to really go on a rant about this, because Mom and Dad, who apparently read my posts, it’d be nice if you actually just told me about that. Because I tend to trust my friends more than I trust you guys. Not because you will cause me more harm in my life intentionally, but because you wreck my entire life by being too damn interfering in my life for the sake of...
My parents apparently look up my tumblr on a regular basis. So yep, this sucks.
I'm sorry everybody. I don't think this will last.
day 258
My stress level has just been high lately. I think anyway. I feel like life is moving and I’m stuck in pause. I don’t feel like I can keep up or handle anything. I even took a knife from the kitchen and hid it in my dresser in case I feel like I need to cut. I was going to post that the day I did it, but I don’t want people to think of me like that. Where everyone starts freaking...
1 tag
YOU MUST READ THIS. ALL OF IT. SERIOUSLY READ IT....
kaylynn123:
whatplanetareyouonhollie:
I have been trolled to the extreme…
OMG.
This guy is my hero.
THIS PERSON IS A TROLLING GOD.
trolling at it’s finest
holy @#!*%
Third time I’ve ever successfully been trolled… Feels bad man.
you got me….
Spero quod Deus fortes est et per spei fortes sum.
I hope because God is strong and through hope I am strong.
day 252
WE WON. Cole Valley Christian High School beat Valley High School! Yeah im pretty stoked. my best friend Joel had some awesone tackles. i didnt do very well myself though :/ dont matter though cuz we beat them!!!
on a side note, I HATE ONSIDE KICKS LIKE NONE OTHER.
day 250
ummm…wow…was not expecting this…im not sure about what just happened. but i think its good. and its been 250 days as of tonight…wow…
sorry for the vague nature of this but…im just kinda reeling into trying to understand whats happening.
day 248, still
i think life would just be better for everyone if i was locked up in a mental hospital.
day 248
almost been 250 days……
i still have urges but i think i do have it under kinda control now. but i dont feel much better about myself. im still a terrible person. and not just because of Margaret.
can i tell you guys a secret? and you promise not to report me to the people who would lock me up?
i have a fascination with death. not with dying…with watching death. ive had dreams...
day 244
well…
i just googled “why am i still single?”
yep. this is what my life has come to.
